The Movie Thread

Discussion in 'Sports and Entertainment' started by Dolph, Oct 31, 2016.

  1. Rheinkreis

    Rheinkreis

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    That is more or less what normies were saying about pro wrestling in 1985 after the first WrestleMania.
     
  2. RockMan

    RockMan

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    Except wrestling was awesome back then and Marvel movies are OK at best.
     
  3. darthtbone

    darthtbone

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    Interesting thing is they are doing this Avengers in 2018, then a direct continuation in 2019. They say after 2019, they are closing out THAT run of primary characters. No more Iron Man, Captain America or Thor. New characters are going to continue the story. RDJ is kind of the glue that holds it all together. Without him, it may collapse.
     
  4. RockMan

    RockMan

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    I just hope the "shared universe going on forever" idea dies soon. I am sick of being told what to like. That's what makes reviewing movies so hard. I actually enjoyed doing it but now every movie is like:

    Fast and Furious - Trash
    Marvel - Eh, ok but sorta boring and dumb. If I say this at a party I'll get my head torn off

    DC - Great ideas and visuals; flopped execution. If I say this at a party I'll get my head torn off

    Every other movie, tried to be quirky and interesting but forgot the whole "having interesting characters, plots and stories" thing.
     
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  5. OP
    OP
    Dolph

    Dolph

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    Watched this the other day:



    It was one of the better war movies I've seen in a while. Very small scale, basically all in one location with a couple of characters, but it squeezes a helluva lot of suspense out of it. It almost verges on horror movie in some ways.
     
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  6. Winbot

    Winbot Administrator

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    and then you do
     
  7. Winbot

    Winbot Administrator

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    There is something weird about the green screen backgrounds of comic book movies that really bugs me. It's an uncanny valley effect that didn't happen back when it was more obvious. The blurriness/grittiness effects to blend people into the fake backgrounds doesn't work because it's always slightly off. Even though I'm never looking for it, people always seem to "pop" out of the backgrounds, like a 1950's recording stage with flat backdrops. Even generic stuff is fake, they never leave the studio, the characters could be talking at a bar but even that is a CGI backdrop.
     
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  8. RockMan

    RockMan

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    Not in theaters and I never enjoy them. Are you paying attention?
     
  9. Master

    Master

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    I just saw Star Wars VIII, The Last Jedi.

    I enjoyed it. It was legitimately surprising in the way Empire Strikes Back was the first time I saw it. Didn't seem to be a scene for scene re shoot of ESB which I was expecting.

    It opens up with a hurried evac of the rebel base at the last movie. Kind of what happened off screen between Star Wars and ESB. Oh god, a scene for scene re-shoot I thought.

    Poe (the Hispanic X Wing pilot from the last movie) blasts the shit out of some Star Destroyer variant. Lost a shit ton of the bomber in fighter wing but brought the ship down. Leia Demotes him. Fleet jumps to Hyperspace and BAM. The New Order follows them. There is a bit of "can they track us or is there a tracker/spy" thing going on. Some purple haired cat lady is now the Admiral in charge.

    Cuts back and forth between them trying to fight a running battle with the New Order (can we just call these fucks the Empire already) and Ray trying to get Luke to train her. She starts having some force conversations (telepresence?) with Kylo Ren, AKA Darth Emo.

    It then cuts to Darth Emo getting belittled by Snoke (BTW, he's not human) saying he got beat by a girl with no training and he's not worthy of being the Heir to Darth Vader. He then leaves. He takes his ship and goes to fight the Rebel Cruiser. His mom (Leia) is on there. He hesiates, but his wingmen blow the bridge up. Ackbar, and a bunch of others are on the bridge and sucked into space. Leia included.

    Scene cuts to Luke training Rey. She does some earth shattering shit and scares Luke. Talking Vader level power with little control. (Trailer where Luke says it scares me now) He tells Rey how he went to confront Ben Solo (Pre-Darth Emo times) and Darth Emo took the building down onto him and killed all the students.

    At this point, the movie shifts to near real time until the end. Fleet is slightly faster than the hulking Empire ships in Sublight, but is burning fuel and can only jump to lightspeed once. Purple Haired Catlady Admiral decides to just keep running. Poe, being the asshole fighter pilot that he is tries to get a way to beat them. There is a way to disable the Lightspeed Tracker, but they need a Hacker. The crazy old alien who had Luke's lightsaber in the last movie knows the person. Finn (black ex stormtrooper) then tries to escape in a lifepod. He is caught by a fat asian chick. They then take a smaller shuttle and have a misadventure while trying to find the hacker. Leia, floating in space, uses the force to get back on the ship, but then passes out.

    At this point it cuts back and forth (2-3 minutes per scene) between Rey's attempted training, the sublight chase, and the misadventures trying to get the hacker. Rey eventually goes back to the Falcon, thinking she can turn Kylo Ren back to the Light. Chewy and R2 and a stowaway Porg drop out of lightspeed, rey bails out in a lifepod and gives herself up to the first order. Kinda shades of RoTJ, but not a direct copy.

    Fleet is running out of gas. This is the first time in Star Wars where I've seen realistic sublight flight physics. Delta V takes gas, and there is only so much of it. Admiral Catlady is loading the Rebels off the big cruiser to smaller transports. Poe stages a mutiny. He suspects Catlady of being a traitor. Takes the ship and assumes command at gunpoint. And it looks like she is indeed a traitor. Leia is in the Medbay.

    Somewhere around here, Luke decides to end the Jedi. He goes to burn the tree/temple where the books of Jedi shit are. MOTHERFUCKING YODA SHOWS UP. He then has some Yoda Knowledge he drops on Luke. Luke knows what he must do, but Yoda basically calls down lightning like Thor and burns the temple.

    Rey and Emo are before Snoke. He now stokes Emos's Ego, and tries to turn Rey. She refuses. She tries to force grab her lightsaber like Luke in RoTJ, and he basically goes no bitch, and bonks her in the head with it. Tells Emo to fully embrace the darkside and cut the bitch. As he orders Emo to take his lightsaber, and kill her, he uses the force, turns Rey/Luke/Anakins' lightsaber sideways, as it sits on Snokes throne, and ignites it running Snoke thru. One of them (not obvious) then force pulls it through Snoke cutting him in half. There is then a 5 minute Lightsaber vs Imperial Guard fight. Snoke reveals he is who facilitated them talking via the force before he gets it.

    At the end of the fight, Emo now wants to be the new ruler, with Rey as his consort/queen/whatever. Rey's parentage is not yet revealved (isn't by the end of the movie) but I get the feeling they are not siblings. They pull the lightsaber apart and BOOM. Both knocked out. Apparenlty Lightsabers have a fuckton of stored energy.

    At this point, Finn and Chunk have snuck onto the Imperial Ship with the Hacker. As they are about to disable the tracker, they are caught. Hacker turned on them. Fleet now starts picking off the rebel ships.
    Leia blows the door open to the bridge after waking up in sick bay after having a force moment with Luke.

    Poe is knocked out and loaded on a transport. Catlady tells Leia, this one is trouble. She says I know.

    Catlady then launches the transports. The Hacker tells the imperials the plan. THey start picking off the unshielded transports as they come in range.

    Admiral Catlady turns the Cruiser and jumps to lightspeed THROUGH the Super Star Destroyer. That fucks some shit up. It basically now becomes and escape from a burning ship for Chunk, Finn and their droid. Rey has escaped already. Admiral Hux (skinny white guy) tries to assume Supreme Leader and Darth Emo isn't having it.

    What's left of the rebels make it to a Salt Desert Planet. It's less Hoth and More Helms Deep (big weapon vs unbreakable door). They take some 50 year old speeders from the first rebellion (abandoned base, no pilots, old weapons, again, Helms Deep) It's not going well. Chunk saves Finn. Luke shows up. Some sappy reuinion shit with Leia then he goes out to face the first order alone. Poe, now thinking strategically after Admiral Catlady's sacrifice, realizes Luke is only buying them time, like Obiwan did on the first Death Star. There's only a few dozen of them escaping out the caves in the back (Hence why i say this is like Helm's Deep) while Luke literally gets fired on by 20 fighters, and a dozen AT-ATs. Hux orders them to stop firing after Emo goes Emokillah on Luke.

    Luke is still standing.

    He says he must face him alone. Hux says no. Take me Down. Hux countermands. He force slams his ass into the wall. Pilot goes "Right Away Sir" (funniest moment of the movie).

    They fight. Luke does a sorta ObiWan after the Rebels are almost out. While this fight is happening, Rey finds them, and uses the force to move a shit ton of Rocks (Luke had said earlier, it's not about moving rocks) and loads what's left on the Falcon.

    Emo runs Luke through. It doesn't faze him. Turns out, Luke is doing some tangible force ghost / astral projection shit. Aka how he got there with no ship. He then faces out. Scene cuts to Luke collapsing where the Jedi temple was. he then gets back up on the meditating rock, watches the sunset, has some force telepathy shit with Leia, Rey and Emo, and then dissolves like Yoda.

    Darth Emo enters the Rebel Base. The Rebels blast to Hyperspace in the Falcon. Chunk is passed out on the same medbay couch that Luke was on after the cloud city Vader fight. Finn opens a drawer to get her a blanket, and the Journal of the Whills (aka Jedi History Books) are in there. Rey either stole them or Luke put them on the Falcon.

    Fadeout.
     
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  10. Iron

    Iron

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    I saw the first of this last series of Star Wars and didn't like it at all. I hate that they don't even pay lip service to practicing and learning anything, the black and the woman were just instantly great at whatever they were doing. At least in the first set Luke had to travel to some distant swamp planet and train with the great jedi master before he could do anything. The girl and the black in the new one just had to pick up a light saber and they were instantly good at it. Maybe I am nitpicking, but it still rubbed me the wrong way.
     
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  11. Master

    Master

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    The girl I will handwave as she's obviously a Vader level force wielder. Remember Vader did some really big shit as a kid (blowing up spaceships and such) basically letting the force take him wherever.

    The black guy, for lack of a better term was a military trained infantry/shock troop. Even Han didn't cut his own hand off the first time he touched a lightsaber. He was much more of a background character this time.
     
  12. Tzar

    Tzar

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    Remember, JJ Abramowitz didn’t make this one, an actually good and creative director did it. JJ is shooting the next one and will probably suck big, fat, hairy, sweaty donkey balls.
     
  13. OP
    OP
    Dolph

    Dolph

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    If there was any residual doubt that movie critics are bought and paid for.
     
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  14. Aethelstan

    Aethelstan

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    Just like the first trilogy, the best movie in the series is the one that had the big name Skype director on the bench jerking off into potted plants.

     

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